When we were little we only went to the pediatrician when you were bad. Now, however, thanks to the creation of primary care centers, we try to offer parents what is called Primary prevention, which consists of offering knowledge and tools so that children achieve a state of health as optimal as possible and that they become ill, as a result, as little as possible.
Health professionals have always had the total confidence of the population, which assumed a role of inferiority in which professionals acted in a paternalistic way, telling mothers and fathers what they had to do, blaming them if they did not and making decisions regarding children's health. Currently, the opposite is intended to happen, for mothers and fathers to be more independent and that is why they are offered the information for them to make decisions.
Internet and the publication of various books on parenting, which did not exist in the past (or were very limited), has made many parents very informed and that upon arriving at the pediatrician or the nurse they receive outdated information, which is already a problem And, what is worse, that they receive value judgments or reprimands, as if we were still in the time of our parents.
Faced with this situation, there are mothers who respond and give their vision, telling the truth about what they do at home, but there are others who prefer to lie, give the reason to the professional, who in many cases says sovereign nonsense, and then “I will do what seems best to me”.
Lying to the pediatrician about breastfeeding
One of the issues that generates more controversy in the pediatrician's consultation is breastfeeding. Breastfeeding until six months is usually not very problematic, even if you hurry me it may not be too criticized until the year, however, once the year passes, many pediatricians (and when I say pediatricians I also say nurses) they start making faces if a mother says she is still breastfeeding and some even dare to recommend leaving it with phrases like "it doesn't contribute anything anymore", "you can take it away" and, in the worst case, "what it has now is vice", etc.
Faced with this scenario, and when a mother receives the same message several times, it may happen that one day she simply decides to say that she no longer breastfeeds: "No, it's been a few months since she has almost remembered." This avoids an absurd confrontation and receiving a message that makes no sense. A child must be breastfed until your mother or child decides that enough is enough.
Feeding in the pediatrician or nurse's office
It is quite related to breastfeeding, but feeding is also another problematic issue. Complementary feeding is recommended after six months and many professionals remain anchored in giving food and water before that time.
Then, after six months, some papers are delivered as instructions that, in theory, are recommendations to have a guide, some clues on how you can start the complementary feeding. However, many professionals consider these papers authentic commandments, mandatory guides whose lack of follow-up could cause serious health problems for babies.
A mother arrives and says that her son does not like fruit and that he is not giving it and the pediatrician, instead of saying “you will give it later, to see if he accepts it better”, he replies that his son you have to drink fruit because if you don't have lacks, it will stay thin or it will happen to you to know what. Because of this in the following visits a mother will say that "oops, eat everything ... small amount, but everything."
Sleep in the same bed or in the same room
Finally, the last of the most controversial topics in a consultation (at least they are the three topics on which I found the most differences) is the one that concerns the place where the baby sleeps.
The first weeks is logical to sleep in the same room as the parents, but after three or four months, when there is a theory that they already begin to sleep several hours in a row (which in most cases is a lie), pediatricians More daring (or outdated) begin to recommend that the baby leave the family room.
The next cut-off age is six months, when according to Estivill and other authors the babies sleep already all night from the pull (lie again on most occasions) and therefore have to leave the parents room . Even if you wake up several times at night, starting at six months, many pediatricians say that every family member has to sleep in their place.
For this reason I have found more than one mother who on some occasion has come to tell me "I know I do it wrong, but still in our room", to which I usually answer something like "well ... what do at home at night is your business ”. Other professionals, on the other hand, say that "that cannot be", "then it will cost you much more to get it out", "he will sleep with you until he leaves home" or "you are creating a dependent person", in addition to other things without meaning and without any scientific support.
Do you lie to the pediatrician or the nurse?
I do. I confess that I have lied to the pediatrician on occasion, but I also have to say that as time has passed I have stopped, I guess because it doesn't bother to be judged so much, and it doesn't bother so much to receive advice that you know you won't follow (although if the thing is very serious, we complain formally).
Further, Telling the truth is a way to normalize what you are doing. If only one person says that they sleep with their child in bed, they will be marked for life, if they are tens and if they also talk about it naturally and showing that you know what you are talking about, a pediatrician can get to understand the reasons or, at less, accept that there are people who prefer to do so.
But of course, to tell the truth you have to be prepared. It is not the same to do when the baby is few weeks old and motherhood (or paternity) is lived with many doubts, tension and with little desire to receive reprimands, than when your child is 2 or 3 years old, everything is much quieter.
